Korean Britney is back and this time she’s uh… singing about hurricanes, named “Venus”???
When last we left fair BoA (which, I just learned, reportedly stands for “Best Of Asia”!), she was attempting to translate her homeland success into some American chart-toppers. Unfortunately, “Project: English Crossover” didn’t go too well and she has apparently packed up her glittery eye make-up and AutoTune and headed back to the loving arms of her original fanbase in Korea. No, the U.S. had no love for B’s robo-funk pop hits and the slick, heavily choreographed videos that accompanied them which is a shame cuz I feel like the girl had a decent shot at making it here. However, her team might wanna fall back on the mega-processed vocals that have her sounding like a singing C3PO devoid of any human personality the next time (if there is a next time) that they try to break her here in the U.S.
Disappointing crossover attempts aside, BoA is back with her patented brand of radio-friendly pop and dancetastic, eye candy visuals to match. Yes, the Notorious B.O.A. is slayin’ ‘em over in Korea with current smash “Hurricane Venus”, the title track from her upcoming album. The single employs the same formula that didn’t work for her American debut: an electropop ditty + a rubbery baseline ÷ a catchy chorus x heavily AutoTuned vocals (ugh!), and it ultimately = a cluttered bootleg version of the infinitely better “Eat You Up”. The video, on the other hand, finds her a little sexier, a lot blonder and still ready to rock the house with a badly dressed boy band dancing behind her—- more on that in a minute.
What I love about K-Pop videos like this is that they are big budget, over the top choreo-rgies of peppy routines, crazy styling and splashy special effects (Rain’s “Rainism”, for example) and in that regard, B.‘s latest does not disappoint. One minute the girl is channeling some sort of imprisoned ice princess bride being attacked by flying silver JabbaWockeeZ in boas(!) and the next minute she’s dressed like a 20’s flapper/biker chick hybrid all while chirping in two languages about this mysterious “hurricane”. And while some of the outfits get a pass from me, that get-up where B to tha O-A is rocking what looks like her momma’s beach clam dig baseball cap and her grandmother’s favorite cocktail party blazer was not.a.good.look. And um… what the h*ll was up with the styling for the dancers? Mesh tops, leopard skinny slacks, lace leggings—- was Full Force dressing these dudes???
The good news is that “Hurricane Venus” still comes off looking sorta polished despite the cheap ‘n’ tragic gold lamè awfulness and those unfortunate 80s wardrobe choices. The bad news is that the song is kinda wack and her choreo was much better last year when she was pretending to be Ciara. However she is a huge megastar in Korea so if they like their pop girls on the cheesy side (which they apparently do), then they’re more than welcome to take Ke$ha as well. Grade: C
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